How to Get Rid of Ego (Ahankar): A Practical Spiritual Path
· 5 min readहिंदी में पढ़ें
The short answer
In Ekantik Vartalap, Premanand Ji Maharaj explains that ego is pride in things that were never truly ours — our learning, looks, family, wealth, youth or strength. Even saying 'I have no ego' is a sign of it. The only pride worth keeping is 'I belong to God.' The practical step: whenever you feel proud of something you did, remember that the body, the ability and the result all came from God, and keep chanting His name so devotion, not the 'I', grows.
You did something good — helped someone, did well at work, finished your chanting — and a quiet voice said, "See how good I am." Or perhaps someone told you that you come across as proud, and it stung, because you honestly don't feel that way.
Ego is one of the hardest things to see in ourselves, precisely because it is the one doing the looking. The good news is that the satsang teaching does not ask you to fight it with more effort of the "I." It shows you where pride comes from, what to put in its place, and a simple way to practise every day.
What is ego, really?
In Ekantik Vartalap, Maharaj Ji lists the many forms ahankar takes: pride in learning, in beauty, in family lineage, in wealth, in youth, in strength, and more 8:13. In another satsang he adds caste, cleverness, possessions and relationships to the list 16:59. All of these have one thing in common — they belong to the body and the world, not to who we truly are.
He invites a simple test. If even one hair falls from your head, you cannot put it back 8:13. You cannot stop your hair from turning white. You did not design this body; if you had, you would have made it taller or fairer to your own liking. So what exactly are we proud of 8:13? The power to act and the results of acting both come from God. We have been given the freedom to choose between right and wrong action — the plough, the oxen, the seed and the field all belong to Him 8:13.
The Bhagavad Gita says the same: all actions are carried out by the qualities of nature, but one confused by ego thinks, "I alone am the doer" (Gita 3.27).
Why do people think I'm proud when I don't feel it?
This is a question many ask, and Maharaj Ji's answer is gentle but direct. Saying "there is no ego in me" is itself the mark of ego — like a patient insisting to the doctor that he isn't ill 33:06. Who certified that you are free of pride? Your own mind did, and that is exactly where pride lives 33:06.
He points to how the greatest devotees spoke of themselves. Hanuman Ji, praised as the wisest and strongest, called himself lowly before Shri Ram. Shabari, a great devotee, called herself the least among women. Goswami Tulsidas wrote that if he told the story of his own faults, it would fill a whole book 33:06. When ego is truly absent, Maharaj Ji says, a person feels, "I am lower than all beings" — and it is the saints around them who recognise their humility, not they themselves 33:06.
This is not about putting yourself down. It is about dropping the need to prove you are good.
What is the difference between ego and self-respect?
Many people say, "I'll give up ego, but I must keep my self-respect." Maharaj Ji asks what we actually mean by swabhiman. Usually it turns out to be pride in caste, family, education, money or position — which is simply abhiman under a nicer name 16:59.
True swabhiman, he explains, is connected to the swa, the real Self: "I belong to God," "I am a part of the Lord" 16:59. This is pure and no one can take it away. And when it is genuinely felt, you see the same Self in everyone, so there is no room for rivalry or hostility 16:59. Wherever there is quarrelling, there is ego — even if we call it self-respect 16:59.
So you don't need to become a doormat. You simply move your sense of worth from the shifting things of the world to the one thing that never changes.
How does devotion dissolve ego?
A seeker once said that his devotion lasts for a while and then pride creeps in. Maharaj Ji's reply was striking: if pride comes, then what you are calling bhakti is still only an activity — real devotion has not yet awakened. When bhakti truly comes, ego has no chance to remain 8:13.
Pride arises when the inner mind is still in ignorance and the colour of satsang has not yet sunk in 8:13. The cure is not to stop your practice, but to deepen it. If you must take pride in something, he says, take pride in this: "I am the Lord's servant; He is my Master" 8:13. Every other pride — of body, wealth or anything of maya — will fall away as that one grows.
The Gita describes the devotee who is dear to God as free from possessiveness and ego, friendly and compassionate to all (Gita 12.13). That is not a personality you force on yourself; it blossoms as love for God grows.
A daily practice to loosen the grip of ego
- Morning offering (2 minutes). Before starting the day, say inwardly: "Whatever I do today, the strength is Yours and the result is Yours" 8:13.
- Catch the "I" after success. When you feel proud — of a good result, praise, or even your chanting count — pause and recall the hair you cannot put back 8:13. Then say "Radha Radha" or your chosen name a few times.
- Don't defend; reflect. When someone calls you proud or rude, don't argue that you aren't. Ask yourself where they might be right, and pray for humility 33:06.
- Check your "self-respect." In any argument, notice whether you are protecting your caste, degree, position or image. If so, that is abhiman — let it go 16:59.
- Read one line of a humble saint daily. A verse of Tulsidas or a prayer of Hanuman Ji keeps the right picture before the mind 33:06.
- Evening review (5 minutes). Note one moment when the "I" took over, without guilt, and offer it to God.
If ego tends to show up as anger in your home or workplace, you may also find how to control anger helpful, and how to handle insult and criticism calmly for the moments when pride gets hurt.
Ego doesn't vanish in a day, and you don't have to win against it by yourself. Every time you remember that you belong to God, the "I" grows a little lighter. Start with today's first small offering.
From the Bhagavad Gita
Bhagavad Gita 3.27
प्रकृतेः क्रियमाणानि गुणैः कर्माणि सर्वशः ।अहङ्कारविमूढात्मा कर्ताऽहमिति मन्यते ॥
All actions are carried out by the qualities of nature, but one confused by ego thinks, “I alone am the doer.”
Full meaning of Gita 3.27 →Bhagavad Gita 12.13
अद्वेष्टा सर्वभूतानां मैत्रः करुण एव च ।निर्ममो निरहङ्कारः समदुःखसुखः क्षमी ॥
Krishna describes a devotee dear to him: one who bears no hatred toward any being, who is friendly and compassionate, free from possessiveness and ego, even-minded in pain and pleasure, and forgiving.
Full meaning of Gita 12.13 →Hear it from the source
Ekantik Vartalap clips this article draws on, starting at the relevant moment.
Frequently asked questions
People call me arrogant, but I don't feel any ego. Who is right?
In Ekantik Vartalap, Maharaj Ji compares this to a patient telling the doctor, 'I'm not ill.' The certainty that 'there is no ego in me' is itself the voice of ego. Instead of defending yourself, quietly look for where others may be seeing pride, and ask God for humility.
Is self-respect (swabhiman) also a kind of ego?
What most people call self-respect — pride in caste, family, degree, money or position — is, Maharaj Ji says, simply abhiman under another name. True swabhiman is the awareness 'I am God's own, a part of Him.' That kind cannot be taken away and never leads to quarrels.
I feel proud after doing seva or naam-jap. How do I stop that?
Maharaj Ji explains that if pride arises, devotion has not yet truly entered the heart; what we call bhakti is still only an activity. Keep doing it sincerely, and remind yourself that the strength to do it was given by God. As real devotion grows, pride has no room left.
Does getting rid of ego mean I should think I am worthless?
No. Humility is not self-hatred. The saints who called themselves lowly were full of devotion and strength. The point is to stop taking credit for what God gives, while knowing your real worth: you are an eternal part of God.
Have a question of your own?
Ask Saarthi in Hindi, English or Hinglish and get an answer grounded in the satsangs, with sources.
This article was written with the help of AI (Claude) from the satsang sources linked above, which are auto-transcribed — please listen to the original for exact words. Saarthi is independent and not affiliated with or endorsed by Shri Premanand Ji Maharaj, his ashram or the Bhajan Marg channel. Not a substitute for medical, legal or mental-health advice.
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